As if things were not difficult enough already, my back has gone from bad to worse. On Feb 2, I had an interview at American Express to possibly move into a new position. My back had been getting better, with the help of regular acupuncture treatments. Unfortunately, since insurance does not cover treatments and I am out of a job, I had to stop going. As I was getting ready for my interview, my back really started to hurt again. By the time Glenn got home, I realized that I would have to use my walker to get to & from the interview. Great! That's exactly the way I want to walk into an interview (no pun intended).
I made my way down to the Amex building, did my interview in excruciating pain and came home. Thank goodness, Taifa came over that evening. Glenn left for his show and suddenly, Kannon started to have quite a bit of difficulty breathing and his lips were turning blue. My sister Kelly called and heard him over the phone. She said, "that is not normal. Call his pediatrician now." I called and she told us to get to the ER.
Thank God Taifa was with me, because I would not have been able to bring him myself. By this point, I could not walk standing up. I had to lean all the way over my walker. Long story short, Kannon was released with the diagnosis of an upper respiratory infection. I was so scared it would be RSV and was incredibly relieved.
The next morning, the pediatrician called and wanted me to bring him in. I realized that walking was even more difficult than before and that it was dangerous for me to be alone with Kannon. I could not even pick him up. Paul came to the rescue this time. What would we do without Tai & Paul? He took us to the ped. As I "walked" into the office I was in so much pain that I could not hold back the tears. They offered me a wheelchair, but sitting is even worse.
Since then, I have had a consult with a neurosurgeon on 2/10. They can't believe how severe my case is. They actually wanted to admit me on the spot. However, they will not be an approved provider until 2/16. The office called and tried to have Aetna make an exception, but to no avail. Thanks a lot, insurance (come on Obama, let's get that health care reform done!) By the time I got home, I could not stand up. I had to crawl on the sidewalk to get back into my building and Glenn had to wheel me up to the apartment on a luggage cart. Side note: I don't think anyone even took a second look at a sobbing woman crawling on the sidewalk - gotta love NYC.
I had to return to the hospital the next day for a consult with another surgeon, since the one I met with before would be out of town next week. After that, I had to have preoperative testing. They had to get me a stretcher because I could not move by this point. I can't believe that I have to wait until next week to have the damned surgery.
I have been in more physical pain than I would ever wish anyone in a lifetime. Fortunately, Dr. O, my surgeon at Columbia Presbyterian, managed to move the surgery up from 2/19 to 2/17. I would have 30 more babies without pain meds before I would go through this pain again. The surgery is not supposed to be a big deal, but the Dr thinks my recovery will be much longer than normal, due to the incredible amount of inflammation in my back. Also, I am not allowed to pick Kannon up for 6 weeks after the surgery.
I hate to even say this, but what next? First we lose a child, we go through a very stressful pregnancy, finally get our earth baby, I lose my job and then need back surgery & can't even hold my baby? SERIOUSLY????
Thank God my father in law is here. It's a tight squeeze, but he has been a godsend. I am so thankful for him. I'm not sure what we will do about 24 hour care post surgery, but right now, my father in law is our angel. I'm sure that my friends will continue to help, but I can't expect them to be here 24/7. I wish something could be easy or go well this year.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
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